I'm Thinking About You
I don't want anything in return
In my 76 years, I have gotten to know a bunch of people. As my mind wanders a bunch, I have thoughts about lots of them. Family members, members of different communities where I have lived and worked, and with whom I have participated online, many of them slide through my thoughts. I attempt to touch base with many people who are my age, sometimes with just a text that says, “I’m thinking about you.” As time allows, I try to call some of them periodically, especially the ones who are over 90 years old.
Periodically, I facilitate an online class I titled “Navigating Grief.” My thoughts frequently go to current or past participants, and recently I sent several of them text messages just to let them know I was thinking about them. One of them replied, “How come?”
“Great inquiry,” I thought. Then I replied, "Just hoping you are well, that you have resolved anything that is bothering you, that the summer heat has not gotten to you, if you are still working.”
What was also in my mind about her, but I did not say, was a conflict she had shared with me about family members. I was hoping that she had resolved that.
Maybe she thought my thinking about her was intrusive in some way. Perhaps she thought she needed to reply in some manner. I had no expectations of a reply, was only wanting to let her know that she was in my thoughts. Is there a way I can let folks know that I have no expectations of a reply or acknowledgment?
My thoughts went to my recently deceased friend, Pat. He was a high school classmate and was an extensive writer on Facebook. Many of his writings were acknowledgments of people he had known, some living, some not. He shared about how these people impacted his life in ways that they likely never knew. His writings influenced me to be more aware of the people in my life and the impact they have had on me.
I sent a bunch of “Thinking about you” messages last night. Should I add that I don’t expect a reply? I don’t want anything. Maybe that should be my message: “I don’t expect anything, and I don’t require a reply. I just wanted you to know that I am thinking about you.” Maybe I’ll try that.